Fear of Missing Out is Rooted in Knowing More is Out There
A child in a family that frequently moves to new towns, knows the fine balance between keeping old friends from the last town and making room for new friends in the new town. Somehow, as adults, we can easily forget that balance as we get rooted and sometimes stuck in a rut. As business professionals, we get comfortable with routine and familiarity. Our place in the community is something we protect and we think we are keeping up with the right people in the right places. And while everything feels fine, one day something happens that opens our eyes to remembering that there is a much bigger world out there.
For some, a big statewide conference opens us up to new people. Others join new groups and are refreshed with all the new people they meet. Whatever gets us out of the networking rut is a good thing. And if you are the type of person who naturally stays quiet and focused on relaxing downtime, you may be one of many who just got used to being low-key following the pandemic and slow reentry to the world of getting out and meeting new people.
So, when we remember what meeting new people is like, we are excited and start realizing we might have been missing out as we get excited about meeting new people in 2025. Take a moment to think about how you can stay connected with new people you meet, what you enjoy, and what activities make you want to pass. By now you can be honest with yourself, and if you don’t like golf outings, just don’t do those. Find what you do like, and make a plan.
Your Networking World is the Size and Scale You Determine
Depending on your business, your client base can come from nearby, across town, or statewide. The goal of good networking is meeting people who consider you a person worthy of a referral as the need arises. Let’s say your target client comes from all over, but you can’t physically network in every place at every time. Consider a few ideas about building strategic networks by finding a wing person in each group.
The key to making this work is being intentional and telling your wing person they are exactly that. Using chamber of commerce groups as an example, let’s say you make a plan to visit 10 groups, once or twice. If you are planning to attend more frequently, they’re going to expect you to join, but if you are a strategic visitor, they may be happy to welcome you. Only if you connect with someone, follow up with them afterward and intentionally learn what the other does and who’s a good client.
Tell this person they are your connection to that group and you know they are a regular member. Let them know to invite you if their group has a public event so you can attend, maybe a fundraiser, for example. Just keep up with them. By relying on them for referrals or introductions, you give that person a feeling of value because they know they are a trusted person in your referral network.
How Phone and Device Addiction Keeps Us From Making Meaningful Decisions
Do you fill your spare time scrolling on social media? Horrific! No, you say, you’re not a child. Now, next time you are at a medical or dental appointment or somewhere people are, and are with their families, take a moment to watch and see how much time they each spend on their phones. It’s not just the kids, the parents are just as bad about scrolling on many occasions. Now, those parents might tell you they aren’t wasting time because they’re looking at important stuff, but they’re still stuck in their devices.
If you’ve broken other habits, you’ve likely noticed people doing things you quit and it’s eye-opening. In shock and horror seeing people open and notoriously doing this or that, it becomes the same observation about phone and device addiction.
Avoiding Being Stuck in the Echo Chambers of Social Media
Humans are taught, and independently learn, to compare our experience to others around us. Social media has become known for affecting and influencing us, and not always for the better. For example, if we are scrolling through content suggesting people are not doing well, sales are down, and the financial outlook is bad, we are more likely to believe these things are true. The problem arises when we make decisions based on our perceptions of social media.
Algorithms cause the echo chamber effect and the tone of what we seek, we are served. Now, we are not exactly telling the algorithms we are feeling negative, but it knows what content we spend more time on and on what topics we engage. Technology and social media algorithms know more about us than we thought we offered, and the more we know, the more meaningful we can be with our time, as we hopefully seek to protect our minds and sense of peace.
Comfortably Accepting Your Value to Other People
Have you ever heard the praise others lay upon you and almost feel embarrassed? The effort you put into creating an image is received by others and they think you are great. It’s true, most people assume everyone else has their stuff together and we are somehow lagging behind. The social proof impact of others liking and trusting you applies to our professional work. People are more comfortable giving referrals to others they like and trust.
Accepting others value us, we must also accept they value the information we share. How often have you seen and valued the work of others and not said anything? Why don’t we say something? Psychologically there is something at play where we get hesitant about praising others. We need to be able to accept that others find value in what we have to say without expecting positive feedback. Keep this in mind when putting content together and doing whatever it is to stay in touch with our new people, and accept that they appreciate you.
Finding New Opportunities to Meet People and Break Out of Your Boundaries
Do something new in 2025. If you used to attend a group years ago, find a current version of that and go check it out. What was the reason you stopped going to that past group? Was it something about the group itself or was it something about where you were maybe it wasn’t a match then. Making a fresh set of attempts at engaging with the people around us is like brainstorming. If you re-attend a civics group you might have quit before, you’ll either be reminded why you left it before, or you’ll find it something you want to stick with for a while.
When we break boundaries and test the waters we remember, we learn, and we grow. Another thing that could be different as we grow, is the amount of contribution we are willing to make in a group setting. If you were too eager in your 30s and accepted all the positions of responsibility, maybe in your later decades you are more comfortable saying no, and letting others carry more weight. It is totally up to you and setting those boundaries as you define your own, helps us feel good about the time we choose to spend networking with others.
Keeping in Touch and Being Strategic About People With Whom You Make Plans
When recommending being strategic, also focus on being organized. Think of the new people we like when we are networking, as valuable team members. Schedule times in your calendar to send them a call or text to say hello. You don’t always need something to share with them to make it meaningful if you come across as someone who legitimately wants to keep in touch.
Even if none of these people ever send you a referral, doesn’t it feel better to spend time talking to people over being stuck scrolling through your device?
Additionally, knowing that the other person with whom you build rapport may be a connection for something else you never thought of. While you’re trying to keep them up to speed on what you both do in business, you could be missing out on another connection in common. So keep it light, and keep it comfortable in following up and making plans for keeping in touch as you go forward meeting new people in 2025.
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